I’m Anastasia, a children’s book illustrator and early years teacher from the Netherlands. I really love being able to work with toddlers and combine it with my illustration work, they go together like peas and carrots. I’m half Russian and feel a bit like a nomad when it comes to my roots. I have a bachelor’s degree in social work, in hindsight I’d probably should have studied psychology, creative therapy, child development, botany, English or writing instead. I’ve lived in the UK for roughly five year. I moved back to my hometown Nijmegen (fun fact: it’s the oldest city of the Netherlands!) at the beginning of 2024 when my relationship ended with my former partner.

Now brace yourself for the not so fun bit…. I’ve had depression for over half my life. I genuinely don’t remember life without it. It stems from growing up with physical and emotional abuse and neglect in our household. In my teen years I also experienced repeated SA (I won’t write the ‘R’ word as I’m aware it might trigger others) within a ‘relationship’ (I was a minor, he was an adult). This combination of experiences gave me CPTSD, anxiety and depression, alongside many physical symptoms these diagnoses bring like chronic pain and fatigue. I’ve started therapy again after not managing to cope with the aftermath of having to move back to the Netherlands, living in a triggering environment again and mentally crumbling apart. With the help of medication and professionals I slowly managed to build up a new life and get my own apartment. I recently started EMDR and life seems to be slowly settling down.

So, why share these personal things with the world? In a way it’s exposure therapy for me. For many years I carried lots of shame concerning my past traumas and mental health struggles. It was a secret that had to be kept and I tried my best to pretend everything was fine. I’ve realized these things don’t define me. I don’t want to carry the shame that belongs to others anymore. By being open there’s nothing to hide behind. It’s freeing and helps me in the healing process.

Let’s not make it all doom and gloom and end on a positive note (oh, how my old university professor would be happy that I’m still practising the sandwich method).

These are a few of my favourite things ♪ ♫ ♬… Hobbits, reading, fresh flowers, a warm bowl of oats with apple and cinnamon, candle light, Vincent van Gogh, one of a kind handpainted wonky pottery, the smell of rosemary and lavender, late night campfires, Fantastic Mr. Fox, birdsong, Winnie the Pooh, home-made apple pie, being out in nature, ‘Somewhere over the rainbow’, the woods, walks and cuddles with my dogs Koda and Siep, cosy jumpers, making the first footprints in fresh snow, animal Christmas tree decorations, fresh autumn days, the beginning of spring.